Become the One

It seems in life that we are constantly on the journey of looking for Mr. or Mrs. Right… We spend agonizing years from teens to adulthood seeking this person that will fulfill our purpose and make life worth enjoying. We search for this one to rescue us, like that of a fairy tale, but ask yourself… “Rescue me from what, exactly?”

Are we really asking to be rescued from ourselves? How can we expect another to take us from our own darkness into light? This is an impossible endeavor; the journey will be long, arduous and unfulfilled in the end.

Instead, tell yourself “I am the one to rescue me,” “I am Mr. or Mrs. Right” NOT Mr. or Mrs. Right now but the one worthy of the long haul.

A very important self-learned life lesson is that it is so very important to work on you first. If we put the same energy into ourselves that we put into finding another or CHANGING another, imagine the person you will be in love with. Imagine looking into the mirror and saying “ I LOVE this person” “you are just right for me” these are the conversations we need to have with ourselves. We need to love us first, work on our inner core so that we are able to emanate our own light and like a moth to a flame your counterpart surely will arrive, only to add to your light, not ignite it.

Spend time with yourself, get to know YOU. What do you like? Are you the outdoors type? What is your belief system? Where do you stand on your own feet? Are you on solid ground or sinking quicksand? Self-love is one of the most attractive qualities a person can possess.

In this day and age where sex is so easily had and sold by main stream I assure you it will not be what keeps anyone around. That is merely a small part of a truly whole and complete relationship.

Form your own love, become that person you are looking for. Take the time out of your schedule of texting, tweeting and main streaming and find who you are so that you can rescue yourself through love and understanding. This way another may just find you as appealing as you do, and you then BECOME the right one! –Ask Ms Dare I SayImage

Supportive women vs Dumb chicks

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It has been my distinct pleasure to have to sort out this mystery even wihtin my own life and personal relationships. During the past few years I have come across many women who feel they are being the supportive, nurturing caregiver and helping their man reach the higher ground….(round of applause ladies) take a bow for holding him down! Clearing my throat…Ahem

HOOOOOOWEVER… is he even YOUR man? I know this seems silly and you are thinking “Of COURSE, who would do that for just some random dude” Weeelllll you would be surprised doll… Lets take it back to the question. Is this YOUR man? Are you two in a committed relationship? Have you DISCUSSED this supposed relationship with HIM and not your girls? and did he agree?

You see many women find themselves in these terrible places of pain merely based on poor communication. Yeah it sure looks like you guys are doing the whole relationship thing I mean why wouldn’t it? You spend time together he’s at your place , you cook, you screw, hell you may even share a joke or two, he may even LIVE with you, but DO NOT be mis-led ladies. I f a man wants you he will let you know that you are his woman and he is your man, no guessing or interpreting the stars or snooping in his phone. It will be all on the table.

It is a beautiful thing when two can come together and be supportive while building a dream, trust, friendship and respect begin to grow between the two. Now when you are just a chick taking care of some broke dud neither one of you are respecting each other and most of all you are not respecting yourself. Why would you want to enable a man to do nothing, be nothing and worst off rely on YOU to be all the nothing he can be.

Ladies, if in fact he is YOUR man and you are together taking the time to build, don’t second guess yourself, handle your business and speak life into that man and the life you are building!

On the other hand, if you are just the chick who gases up his car buys his meals and extras… #KILLYOSELF because you don’t know YOUR value so you will NEVER know his!

Sincerely,

Dare I Say